type A plans B
As a child, I thought being a good girl would earn me love and approval—from my parents, boys, teachers, myself, and even God. Holding myself to impossible standards of perfection caused me to constantly question: What if I am not smart enough? Not pretty enough? Not talented enough? Not quiet enough? Not serious enough? Not good enough.
On the outside, perfectionism worked. I successfully constructed the white-picket-fence life of my childhood dreams—until a perfect storm of covering, and crying, and pretending leveled it all and left me asking: How the hell do I get real AND keep this white picket fence from falling down around me?
What is my Plan B?
type A plans B tells the story of a perfect little life—interrupted. On the heels of an unexpected divorce, the author finds that perfectionism has left her completely ill-equipped to handle failure.
A lifelong perfectionist facing new responsibilities and challenges, she describes a pivotal shift in her thinking, “It’s when I finally turned down the role of supporting actress in my own story. It’s where I broke free from approval addiction and leaned into love and vulnerability. It’s how I discovered that God is not afraid of the F-bomb. And it’s when I quit raising perfect children and began whole-heartedly loving the ones I have.”
Anyone who has tried to live life between the lines will identify with the demands of a messy, unpredictable life. type A plans B is Andria’s compelling, heart-warming, and often humorous journey of screwing it all up, facing down big fears, and finding authentic faith.
Excerpt from type A plans B
“I was not equipped to deal with imperfection or failure. Yet it was piling on faster than I could handle. I read any resource promising to solve it. I devoured popular parenting books and determined to become a better mother to my daughter and son. I stood in resolute faith for my husband and our marriage.
I prayed for strength, for peace, and for change. I quoted scriptures, wrote them in my journals, and taped them to my bathroom mirror. I attended Bible studies where I genuinely sought God and began opening myself up just a little to other women of faith.
For nearly seven years, I worked my ass off to fix everything that no one even knew was broken. Just like the nine-year-old me counting awards on the kitchen wall, I set out to be the best I could possibly be. I just knew if I tried hard enough, I could win approval and love. I could perfect my way through my problems, and no one would have to know anything was ever wrong.
But I failed. Being perfect finally wore too thin. Perfectionism could no longer sustain the life I had set out to live. I wanted to be real more than I wanted to be right.”